Lately I’ve been thinking a lot – about the mysterious workings of destiny, elusive nature of luck, biasness of fate and much more. My head already feels heavy! I’ve pruned few things to talk about from this ever growing weed of thoughts.
To put it simply, life doesn’t always unfold the way we expect it to. We grow up believing many things and end up living different things.
These are few delusions to begin with:
- It’s okay to fail – that’s what your boss will tell you. But when you do, it won’t be okay. Not with him. Try it at your risk.
- Work-life balance has no practical application. It simply exists as a definition.
- Wondering that degree from a reputed college will make top organizations come running to you? Be prepared to get your hands dirty when you go job hunting. Pop! Sorry to burst your bubble.
- Dream job! If only earth had corners, I think we would have been able to find it. I am still looking for one.
- Remember your mother, father, grandmother (add all your relatives to the list) telling you that ‘hard work always pays off’. Wait till you actually ‘work hard’ for that promotion.
- 1,2,3… keep counting. Salary increases with the increase in work experience. If this was the case, then the world would have been a peaceful place. You wouldn’t see ‘Keep Calm’ posters floating around you.
If this has got you thinking, then just ‘Keep Calm and Drink Coffee’.
With longing eyes,
I look deep within -
Sifting the dark layers,
Clouding my memory –
Of who I am –
And what I wanted to be.
Sexuality has always been a controversial and a highly debated issue – occupying centre stage as a coffee house discussion or a social concern. One is all the more befuddled by the mere thought of a sexual identity crisis.
Teena Brandon (Hilary Swank) is anatomically a girl, but feels like a boy – trapped inside a body that increases her feeling of discomfort. The social mores do not condone such behaviour. People entertaining such ideas are not only seen as jeopardy to the very fabric of the society, but are also subjected to cruel punishment.
On finding about Teena’s true identity, she is raped and assaulted by her male acquaintances. However, her girlfriend Lana (Chloe Sevigny) stays beside her even after discovering the truth about Teena.
True empowerment comes for Teena not when she’s perfectly able to disguise herself as a guy. But when she’s able to form and establish a successful relationship with Lana – who accepts Teena the way she is. But sadly things come to a brutal end. Order is restored through bloodshed and sacrifice. Teena is shot dead by John and Tom who refuse to accept her as a transgender.
Kimberly Peirce has very intricately woven the themes of courage, identity, freedom and empowerment in ‘Boys Don’t Cry’. After watching Jared Leto in Dallas Buyers Club, I sternly believed that nobody could play a transgender to such perfection. But not until I watched Hilary play Brandon with such finesse. She’s so convincing that for once you don’t want to believe that she’s a girl. Her performance is stellar. Chloe as Teena’s girlfriend also puts up a good show. I like the way the relationship between the two develops and strengthens – like any other boy-girl relationship.
The movie is subversive to the popular notions of sexuality. It is relevant even today – especially in a country like India where same sex marriage is a criminal offence. Unfortunately even in the 21st century, Teena’s fate is shared by many where they are seen as a threat by the society.
Monica embraced the teddy the way she always held onto her mother whenever frightened of something. With ambiguous eyes, she stood there gazing in the direction of the sun. An otherwise playful Monica was touched by a deep silence unknown to her before – silence that’s reminiscent of a coming storm.
The wind chime placed in her room shattered the stillness with its rhythmic soft tune. But it failed to break the overpowering silence with its melody.
The emerald green crystal vase lay on the table sparkling like always. But today the withered sunflower seemed to fade its beauty. It subtly lent a pale and gloomy air to the vase’s sheen. The flowers were two days old. The dried petals in front of the vase lay lifeless, as if nothing – not even the beauty of life itself could revive it.
Monica ran her finger softly over the dried petal. Despite being gentle, she felt its powdery residue coating her fingertips as soon as she touched it. Its fragility bore a close resemblance to that of life. Engulfed by a sudden feeling of vulnerability, she dropped her teddy. It hit the floor without any resistance – the resistance to hold onto what is dear. A drop of tear rolled down from her cheeks. She swallowed its saltiness with a pinch of angst.
She knew that a lot was amiss. She knew that life’s unfairness had not just uprooted her from her world, but had annihilated it forever. A fatal car accident had not just turned her into an orphan, but injured her for life.
Even in the brightest hour of the day, a bleak future awaited her.
The air was filled
With soft tunes-
Of a lovely affair,
Of emotions so sweet-
Making hearts skip a beat.
Like a beautiful pair of swans,
They glided hand-in-hand.
Gracefully they swayed
To the rhythm of every beat.
Every smile or glance exchanged said –
A million words with ease.
On the threshold of a new life,
They gathered every memory of togetherness.
This was their last waltz
As ‘You’, ‘Me’ and ‘I’
Tomorrow being a new dawn as just ‘We’.